I was 19, broke and grieving when I first read this book

When I was 19, I remember being introduced to The Secret by Rhonda Byrne while sitting in the passenger seat of a friend’s car. 

I was pretty lost at that point in my life. 

My mother had passed away two years earlier after a five-year battle with breast cancer. I was 17 when she passed. I was working in kitchens for minimum wage, staying up late, hanging out with the wrong crowd, and dreaming of a better life without really knowing how to get there. 

I remember thinking it was such an odd concept. The idea that there was some kind of “secret” to improving your life felt almost ridiculous. And yet, I was intrigued. 

At its best, the book encourages responsibility, clarity, optimism, and intentionality. 

At its worst, it gets misread as “just think positively and money will fall into your lap.” 

The real message sits somewhere in between. 

People don’t get what they want. 

They get what they consistently focus on, expect, and act in alignment with. 

Here’s how it relates to building and managing your financial well-being. 

1. Thoughts influence behaviour before they influence outcomes 

The book argues that what you think about most often shapes your reality. 

In practical terms: 

Thoughts shape decisions 
Decisions shape habits 
Habits shape outcomes 

If you constantly think: 

• “I’m bad with money” 

• “I’ll never catch up” 

• “I don’t earn enough” 

Your behaviour quietly confirms it. 

2. Focus determines direction 

The Secret teaches that attention amplifies outcomes. 

People misunderstand this as: 
“Think about money and it appears.” 

What actually happens: 

Focus increases awareness 
Awareness increases opportunity recognition 
Opportunity leads to action 

You notice what you’re primed to notice.

3. Gratitude reduces scarcity thinking

One of the strongest parts of the book is its emphasis on gratitude. 

Gratitude shouldn't make you complacent. It should stabilize your nervous system. 

In finance and wellbeing, this matters because: 

Scarcity creates impulsive decisions 
Calm creates better planning 
Fear causes people to self-sabotage

It allows you to appreciate where you’re currently at and still plan for where you need to get.

4. Identity shapes income

The book emphasizes “feeling” wealthy before becoming wealthy. This idea gets misused. 

What it actually means is this: 
you behave like the person you believe you are. 

Someone who sees themselves as: 

• responsible 

• capable 

• long-term oriented 

acts very differently than someone who sees themselves as “bad with money.” 

Identity drives action.

5. Expectation shapes tolerance for discomfort

People who understand what they’re investing in tolerate short-term discomfort better. 

In investing: 

• Volatility feels unbearable when you don’t understand why it happens 

• Discipline collapses when you don’t trust the process 

Expectation isn’t blind optimism. 

It’s understanding how markets work, what risk looks like in practice, and what outcomes are realistic over time.

6. Action is implied, not optional

The Secret is often critiqued for being too “woo-woo” and implying that you can manifest outcomes with just your thoughts, when action is required.  

You don’t manifest without movement. 

The book assumes: 

• you will take steps 

• you will change behaviour 

• you will follow through when opportunity appears 

The thinking primes the action. 

7. Responsibility is empowering

One of the more controversial ideas in The Secret is personal responsibility. 

When misunderstood, it can sound like blame, especially when outcomes were shaped by grief, health, timing, or circumstance. 

When used properly: 

• it means taking control of the next decision, even if the past wasn’t your fault 

• it shifts focus from what you can’t change to what you can influence today 

In money, this shows up as choosing a plan and following through even when conditions aren’t perfect. 

8. Environment reinforces belief

The book emphasizes surrounding yourself with supportive inputs. 

That includes: 

• who you listen to 

• what media you consume 

• how often you hear “this is impossible” 

Your environment shapes expectations. 

9. Emotional state affects decision quality

This aligns closely with modern neuroscience. 

Fear narrows thinking. 
Calm broadens options. 

Emotions don’t attract outcomes, but they do drive decisions.

When people are dysregulated, they make short-term choices that undermine long-term plans.

When people are calm, they can stick to strategy and tolerate uncertainty.

10. The book is incomplete without structure

This is the most important distinction.  

The Secret explains why mindset matters, but it does not explain: 

• financial structure 

• risk management 

• systems and automation 

Mindset without structure creates frustration. 
Structure without mindset collapses under pressure. 

The takeaway  

At its core, the book is about: 

• attention 

• identity 

• expectation 

• emotional regulation 

• behavioural alignment 

These directly affect: 

• spending habits 

• saving consistency 

• investing discipline 

• career decisions 

• risk tolerance 

You can be rational and realistic while recognizing that mindset shapes behaviour. But only action changes outcomes. 

A note for the start of 2026

If you want to start 2026 with more intention, alignment, and forward motion than ever before, it starts with clarity.  

Clarity around your habits, your structure, and the systems supporting your life. 

If you haven’t yet, this is your sign to stop carrying it all alone.  

Book a call below, ask better questions, and build something that actually supports the life you want to live.